Wednesday, April 9, 2008

Project 3, Phase 4--Any and All Comments Welcome!

So, here is Project 3, Phase 4--the poster. I liked this photo as I thought it conveyed the relationship of bone marrow donor and donee. However, the resolution of the photo is not good enough and the headline is centered. There is too much text. So, I revised it...



Here's my revision of Project 3, Phase 4--the poster. The text needs to be darkened, but I like the overall look, color scheme, and photo placement:



Any comments are welcome! Does it convery the message that donating bone marrow not only saves lives, but allows people to live their life? I'm not a designer and sometimes I have a hard time knowing what works and what does not work. Do you think the design on this poster works?

2 comments:

Amanda Agatstein said...

Hi Jill. I like the overall look a lot more and even though I'm not a designer yet either (many of us are not and that is why we're here!), I think it's quite an improvement!

I have a few comments. I don't know that you have to repeat the Web site and phone number. It feels like a lot to me and like it's just trying to fill up space. And while it works better at the top, the link at the bottom only repeats halfway, so it just looks odd.

And you could align the logo text "National Marrow Donor Program" in the box either left or right instead of centered.

I'm not sure about the alignment overall of the image and the text. Maybe some more accomplished designers can comment on that, since that is something I struggle with personally. But I think you could play with it some more, because I'm not certain that the relationship between the image and the text placement is "working," as Amy would say...sorry if that doesn't help much. Maybe you can move the image of Adam up?

As for the message, I think it's more emotional than before, but I wonder if you could make a more "twisty" headline. "Dreams Can Come True" is pretty generic and you could see that anywhere. What about something like "Give and Let Live"? It would be a rhyming twist on the saying "live and let live," it works for the message, and tells people to give.

I like to think of popular and well-known expressions and twist it to work for my message, so maybe you can think of some other headlines that way. Just a thought!

Good luck! Again, I really think this is improved overall.

Joshua Harless said...

hi jill,

looking much better. i think amanda covered the key copy points. I would definitely reduce the phone number and web site size and repetition. Usually, this information is treated lowest on the hierarchy scale and is tucked in with the logo. (The logo can also be smaller.)

For the headline, I would change the color from light brown (too drab) to a bright blue to match the shirt/key into the subject of the poster.

I would also move Adam to the left of the poster, with left arm/shoulder cropped by the poster's edge. This would make Adam facing into the poster, instead of out of the poster. He can also be larger, and fix his vertical scaling so he isn't so squash. The copy/tagline can then live on the left hand side of the poster, perhaps lining up the tagline with Adam's eyeline. The viewer will be drawn to Adam's face then over to the headline, then down to the copy and then over to the logo. (an alternative is flipping Adam's direction he is facing, but leave the image on the left side of the poster, so Adam is now looking at the repositioned headline on the right.)

Now the attention of the viewer is Adam's face and then the large square logo in the bottom right, if you can achieve some balance compositionally with those two elements, it will help your layout. Again, the logo should be smaller.

Another note on color. The colors selected are great, they match the image. However, color can be used as a tool for hierarchy as well. Lighter colors on a white background recede, while darker colors on a white background come forward. Because the phone number and type in the logo are darker they appear to be closer to the viewer--and more important. (also they are large in scale compared to other elements). If the headline and copy is the darker color and the logo and phone numbers are lighter the hierarchy will be switched, and perhaps the viewer looking at the parts of the poster the way you intend them too.

The best way to describe this effect of color is to look at a the horizon, as things get further into the distance they get hazy. The air thickness between the object and viewer is greater, washing out the color. Objects near the viewer aren't covered by as much haze and appear brighter/darker.

hope my ramblings helped.